When you’re getting to know someone online—whether it’s through a dating app, social media, or messaging platforms—it’s important to keep your guard up until you’ve confirmed they are who they say they are. The Oklahoma Department of Securities warns that if you suspect you may be caught up in a romance scam, it is critical to act quickly. Romance scammers often build trust over time, create a strong emotional connection, and then use that relationship to pressure victims into sending money, sharing sensitive information, or making financial decisions they normally wouldn’t.

Here are some next steps you should take if you believe an online relationship may be a scam:

Gather Evidence: Start by collecting everything you can before the scammer deletes messages or disappears. Take screenshots of conversations, save emails, and write down usernames, profile links, phone numbers, and any photos they used. If you sent money, keep receipts, payment confirmations, wallet addresses (for cryptocurrency), or transaction details. The more information you have, the easier it is to report what happened.

Document All Communications: Keep a simple timeline of what’s happened so far, including important dates and details—when you met, when the conversation turned serious, and when money or favors came up. If the person used “urgent” situations (like medical emergencies, travel issues, military deployment, customs fees, or legal trouble), document those messages too. Patterns matter, and your notes can help connect the dots.

Stop Sending Money or Personal Information Immediately: If money has already been sent, do not send more—even if the person claims it’s the “last time,” a “final fee,” or the only way they can come see you. This is one of the most common tactics scammers use to keep the pressure on. Also stop sharing personal details like your banking info, passwords, copies of your ID, or access to accounts. If they’re asking you to open accounts, receive packages, move money, or “help with a transaction,” that’s a major red flag.

Report It to the Right Places: If the scam involves cryptocurrency, investing, or an “opportunity” they want you to fund, report it to the Oklahoma Department of Securities (ODS). You can file a complaint using our online Complaint Form or contact our office directly at (405) 280-7700. You can also report romance scams to the Federal Trade Commission (FTC) and, if money was sent, your local law enforcement agency. Reporting helps protect others and gives investigators a better chance of identifying patterns tied to larger fraud operations.

Monitor Your Accounts and Protect Your Identity: Keep a close eye on your bank accounts, credit cards, and payment apps for suspicious activity. If you shared personal information (like your Social Security number, date of birth, or photo of your ID), consider placing a fraud alert or credit freeze and review your credit reports for anything unusual. Romance scammers often move from emotional manipulation to identity theft or financial abuse very quickly.

The Oklahoma Department of Securities takes financial exploitation seriously and is committed to helping protect Oklahomans from scams—including those that start with a message that seems harmless or sincere. If something feels off, trust your instincts. Taking a pause, verifying information, and reaching out for help can protect both your financial security and your peace of mind.